Love/Hate Letter to Alcohol

I woke up on the ground

I guess I shoulda kept that shit to myself

Turns out I'm pretty good at running my mouth

But not good enough

You know when I go in it's lights out

I couldn't hear a thing 'cause the song was too loud

Last night I had 32 teeth in my mouth

Some went away...

Why'd you have to go and fucking ruin my day?

You're the reason why I got my ass kicked

But you're the only way to drown my sadness

This is my love/hate letter out to alcohol

You're the reason why I got my ass kicked

I was laid out flat like a centerfold

Jakey and his partner drove me home

Looking in the mirror something's wrong

Let me get my dentist on the phone

Found my keys then I went back out

Someone asked me how it all went down

I remember like it's yesterday

I took a shot, took a shot, took a shot, took another shot

Fell right out my fucking chair swinging for his eye

Then a big chrome ring flew in from the side

I thought I died...

Why'd you have to go and fucking ruin my night?

You're the reason why I got my ass kicked

But you're the only way to drown my sadness

This is my love/hate letter out to alcohol

You're the reason why I got my ass kicked